"3 Regrets You'll Have In The Future If You Don't Take Action NOW"
10 years from now, you will regret not for the things that you did, but for the things that you didn't do.
As child abuse survivors, we need sound advice for our fragile hearts. These three have pricked my heart, and I will keep these in mind during the course of my healing journey. I hope that they will also lead you in the right direction so that when you look back on your life 10 years later, you will smile and say, "I did well."
1. "I Wish I Hadn't Compared Myself to Others"
Comparing with your peers, family, and idols--this is different from following their footsteps and learning from them. This comparison leads to feelings of anxiety, not being good enough, and discouragement. In the end, comparison slows us down and gets in the way of our achieving the goals we have.
Every day, look back on the small successes and achievements you made. There is nothing more motivating than seeing one's progress. Make yourself feel proud, put your chin up and stand a little bit taller. Catch yourself when you did well! Self confidence is not an inherent trait, it is a skill you can LEARN. (Youtube: TED - The Skill Of Self Confidence)
2. "I Wish I Had Laughed It Off"
Don't take life too seriously. Laughing will make your life so much easier. It produces hormones that make you feel good, positive, and healthy. It is the best and cheapest medicine in the world. Laugh more.
3. "I Wish I Had Trusted My Intuition"
If you feel a tiny speck of bad vibe, leave. Your intuition is wiser than you think. If someone or something makes you go, "hm...", you MUST listen to that inner voice.
As child abuse victims, we are extremely sensitive to any signs that a person might be abusive. I thought that because of THIS I'd be well able to avoid abusers. This was not true. I had an unofficial foster mother who was extremely passive agressive and emotionally abusive, and all along I thought that something was wrong with ME, not her. After I moved out of her place, I started to realize how blind I was.
If you don't feel safe or comfortable, there is a reason for it.
Do not be sorry to leave, because this is YOUR life.
