"Catching What Initiated the Emotional Storm"
I have recently found out that my emotional storms are often caused by something that is completely unrelated to ME. One morning I called a phone service for a website and the person on the other end was speaking in a rude manner. After I hung up, I found myself crying and saying, "I don't know if I can do this. I don't know if I can do anything in my future". I went to the nurse in the Psychosocial Rehab where I am staying, and talked to her about this. I was feeling "incapable".
The funny thing is, I had NO IDEA WHAT led me to feeling this way until I talked to the nurse. After she asked me some questions, she said that it was the phone call that led me to feeling "incapable". Something small happens and it turns into a gigantic tornado inside me, bringing up all kinds of negative emotions.
The fact is, the phone operator's rudeness had NOTHING to do with me.
I however took this personally and put that on myself.
There is a word for this: Internalization. When something like this happens, we ought to leave them outside, because it has nothing to do with our identity or worth. However, when we are internalizing, we turn the event towards our inside and let it affect US.
This is what I am learning, and working on. Leaving things OUTSIDE rather than taking them on INSIDE.
