"The Art of Distraction"
When my therapist started teaching me about ways to distract myself from my overwhelming feelings, I used to think that distraction is fake, that I would rather let myself go on crying when I feel like it, go on worrying about something because I have to, and vent on my anger to feel better.
But through therapy, books, and personal experience I’ve learned that I was wrong. In fact, the emotions that I feel are sometimes irrelevant to the present. They are triggered and I’m re-experiencing something from my past when I am here now and safe!
The idea of a good cry is misleading. Crying that reinforces rumination prolongs misery. Same with the venting to feel better, it might feel deceptively momentarily satisfying, but research shows that it does not make us feel better like distractions can.
Here are some ways to distract yourself effectively and in a healthy way:
Changing Emotions
The best distractions are ones that actually shift your mood: exciting sport event, funny movie, uplifting book are some examples of this.
Engineering a small triumph or easy success
Doing a procrastinated chore or something from a to do list. This will not only keep you distracted but will give you a sense of achievement and control!
Lifting self image
Lifting self image through activities such as getting dressed up and putting on makeup.
Comparing
This is one that I personally use very often and find VERY useful. Comparing yourself to the less fortunate gives you a bigger perspective on your problem and leaves you feeling grateful for the things you have. While you are feeling like a mess, somebody out there could be wishing they were you!!
Contributing
Helping others in need is a great way to distract yourself and also make yourself feel good. Through focusing on others instead of being stuck with your own problems, you can be freed from the worry trap in your mind. Take note! This does not mean you need to stop caring for yourself so you can constantly give to other people! We need to love ourselves first so we can love others.
Praying to God
If you are religious, praying to diety can give you tremendous peace and sense of freedom.
Try using some of these distractions this week and comment on your favourite!
